Do you focus too much on the negatives?

Recently I had a session with one of my clients and I could tell from the moment she got on the phone that something was wrong.

She sounded down, not her usual cheery self and drained of her infectious positivity.

When we dived into it she was disappointed with the fact that she wasn’t feeling motivated to exercise that week, beating herself up over it and feeling like she had failed, convincing herself that all her hard work was becoming undone.

She had come to a point where after a few weeks of smooth sailing she now believed that going forward everything was going to be easy and she was always going to be full of motivation.

This meant that at the first sign of things not being ‘perfect’, she felt like it was falling apart.

When we started talking about the rest of the week though, it quickly came out that actually, this week had been the best she had done so far.

She had been eating 3 balanced meals with no snacks, taken time for herself to relax, started work on a personal project she had wanted to get round to for months, done more work towards a future promotion and actively found ways to further balance family life with her career.

She had made all this amazing progress, yet she was so focused on a slight negative in the form of a drop-in motivation and what she perceived as going wrong, that she completely missed what was going right.

Oh, and even though she didn’t feel like going to the gym, she still pushed herself to go not just once, but three times!

Yet a few months ago she wouldn’t step foot in a gym, let alone go for a walk, ride her bike or even take the stairs at work, all of which were now a part of who she was.

Once we spun it around and showed her all the positives she realised that actually, overall it had been a fantastic week and her mood was turned on its head.

Because here’s the thing…there’s this huge misperception that once you have a ‘healthy lifestyle’ everything becomes ‘easy’, that it just happens and effortlessly falls into place.

And sure, once the habits are there you’ll have an ‘easier’ time finding motivation to follow through, but there will still be days you’re tired, it’s a drag, or you just don’t feel like doing it.

That’s just life.

So rather than getting so caught up in what is going wrong, take a moment to stop, take a deep breath and think of everything that is going right.

Because if you do, then in an instant you can completely turn a bad day around.

So stop getting so caught up in the bad, and instead make sure you focus on the good.

What do you think?

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